Dear Universe

I am putting it out there.  Out there, out there.  No, I haven't been reading 'The Secret.'   I'm just sort of hoping that if I put it out there (yes, out there, out there), I will squish all the insecurities that make me stay put and really get going to make it happen. 

So - here it is.  I want out.  Well - a little bit out, anyways.  Just enough to reclaim some of the formerly me of me. 

I want - hmmmm - I think I want that old PhD.  But because I didn't figure that out in time to actually apply for this year, it seems that I will have to chill for a year and want something a little different.  (Insert repeated ass-kicking here).

So, dear Universe.  How about a part-time job?  Preferably sometime late this summer.  One that lets me use my brain.  And my skills which are of the general nerd/researcher/writer/project coordinator/sex-health educator/social service-y type variety.  (Yes - I am aware that this is an odd variety.  Anyhoo).  And yes, one that pays me.  And then I want a daycare.  A wicked cool (accredited!) daycare that has amazing programming for Girlio, and possibly Boy-o, depending on the hours of said job.

And I want to go out more.  (And not in that insipid 'mom's night out' business.  What is with that term, anways Universe?  We schlep shit and do shit-work and laundry and dishes and wipe noses and asses and for this get granted the occasional outing, dubbed 'moms' night out'?  I freaking hate that term.  Makes me twitchy.)  Anyways, as I was discussing prior to losing myself in rant, I'd like to talk to my wife more (about topics sometimes of the non-child-rearing-variety).  Talk to friends more (about topics sometimes of the non-child-rearing variety).  Go to gallery opennings and bookstores and coffee shops and bars and river valley walks.  This will require the discovery of a golden, reliable, lovely babysitter (who does not come up on the criminal record or child abuse registry checks, please!) for my beautiful, delightful (and sometimes exhausted) babes. 

I know I'm asking a lot, Universe.  I'm not asking for it to fall into my lap.  I'm not asking for all at once.  I'm not asking for perfection.  I'll work for it.  I've already started.  I was just wondering if maybe you'd, you know, be willing to partner with me on a few things.
 
Because I think I might be worth it.  It's just sometimes a little difficult to think of the reasons why these days.

Yours in gratitude,

Mama T