I just called my wife's machine at work to inform her that I was going to off our number 1 progeny and named a litany of perfectly good reasons. At least, I hope it was her machine. I was a bit, um, frothy... so it might not have been. How bad is it to call some random crown prosecutor to tell them you are going to off your child? Just wonderin'. (They might not get my sense of humour, I fear, what with having to deal with actual child killers and all, and not you know, knowing me and how much I love said progeny. Anyhoo.)
Off to have a panic attack about them impending visit from Child and Family Services. Or possibly the police. And to cope with the young, nap-refusing, crying and screaming at the drop of a hat, waking up the baby, outwardly defying, just plain contrary child of mine. And pray to the gods of zen bestowance (no, I don't actually know if this is a word) to throw some scraps my way.
And yes, I'm sure I'm gonna miss this when he gets older. It's the here and now that seems to present a bit of a challenge.
Sometimes I am blown away by how exactly the same Boy-o and Imogen are. I can't imagine missing this though. I've imposed a time out on myself to keep me away from her right now. Quarantine = mentally unstable mama.
ReplyDeleteHow did you get her to stay??? I want a quarantine too! :)
ReplyDeleteA couple of months ago, my mother had to call and make sure that I wasn't the mother arrested for putting her baby on Kijiji. This has been a constant threat since red-headed screaming baby was born 18 months ago.
ReplyDeleteI locked the bathroom door. She couldn't get in. Not that she didn't try. The ONE time I'm grateful for her poor fine motor skills...
ReplyDeleteI think I would rather deal with a gaggle of social workers than a nap refusing crying screaming and possible baby waking situation. The social workers have gotta be better. Nap breakdowns are my weakest moments and they require the most strength.
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